Sean Hannity: Illegal Alien

This was pointed out to me last week but it took me awhile to summon up the interest to check Wonkette and see if it was true. Besides, the manlove festival at the White House is more interesting. With President Bush holding hands with Saudi Crown Prince Abdullah and the whole Gannongate thing, it looks like dick is on everyone's minds right now. For once, though, it's not the Dick Cheney Death Pool. I, for one, find that refreshing. With those great big old girls finally letting their hair down can it be long before TigerBeat publishes photos of Karl Rove and Paul Wolfowitz sharing a milk shake at the corner drug while making serious googly eyes at each other? Perhaps the truth of the failed Kerry/Edwards campaign will come out and Edwards will finally admit that he's a "pushy bottom."

Given the state of affairs in Washington at the moment, I can completely understand the need for such voracious male bonding. When you've started an endless war on false pretenses, moved to destroy one of the most successful government programs ever developed and your approval ratings have grown smaller than Ann Coulter's waist size, you just need a big, hairy finger up your ass to remind you that you're special.

However, tearing myself away from the gay porn channel that is CNN, I was humorously surprised to discover that Sean Hannity, Professional Irish American Blowhard, is actually a criminal. And the stupid mick let it be caught on tape.

Before we all mix a big pitcher of martinis in celebration of the truth finally revealed, I have to temper this astonishing announcement with reality. He's not going to jail or anything and the infraction isn't really all that severe. It's not like he killed a hooker or anything...that we're aware of.

Apparently Mr. Hannity was just being cute and broke the law on tape. Seems he was down Mexico way, investigating the Minute Man project. For those of you who don't know, the Minute Men are a self-appointed group of "concerned citizens" (two words which should strike fear into anyone sane) who are, out of the goodness of their star-spangled hearts, policing the U.S.-Mexico boarder in an effort to keep illegal aliens out.

Well, everyone needs a hobby.

Hannity was down there giving them undeserved screen time (but on FOX so it's really sort of a wash) and was walking the boarder along with them. Here's where it gets cute. In what can only be described as a fond salute to a junior-high level understanding of borders, Hannity jumped over the U.S.-Mexico border and then reentered U.S. soil to show how easy it was. Mind you, he had to push barbed-wire out of the way to make his point, but Sean's always been a hands-on kind of guy.

In this age of heighted terrorism threat and perma-yellow threat levels which clash with everything, we should all be aware of the seriousness of our boarders. Hannity certainly should be. He's bitched about it enough on his amusing little program. In case someone is unaware, it is illegal to reenter the U.S. from foriegn soil except through a specified "port of entry." And while big business may have you believe otherwise, the entire span of the U.S.-Mexico border does not qualify as a port of entry.

So he's a criminal. He broke the law. It's on tape. Why wasn't he arrested? You would think with all the grousing he does about the border patrol they would be there just waiting to prove their effectiveness to his smarmy self. God help me, maybe he has a point?

Really, this just seems wrong. Petty and insubstantial, sure, but wrong.