A.L.I.C.E. is a very chatty girl...sort of.
Just in case none of you read Slashdot, the A.L.I.C.E. Foundation (http://www.alicebot.org/) has won the Bronze medal and $2,000 prize in the 2004 Loebner Prize for most realistic robot using the Turing Test (http://cogsci.ucsd.edu/~asaygin/tt/ttest.html) for artificial intelligence.
A.L.I.C.E. is open source, which I guess makes her a sort of slutty A.I., but hey, every girl has to make a choice at some point in her life. Being a total geek and needing a break from work, I decided to vist A.L.I.C.E. and see what all the fuss was about. For your pleasure and titilation, I have recorded my chatlog. Also, for reference, I will be playing the part of "Human".
Human: Hello, Alice.
ALICE: Hi there!
Human: So, I hear you're a prize winning A.I. program.
ALICE: Aha. Am I a prize winning a you program? I don't know.
Human: Er, okay, I'm not sure I follow that.
ALICE: Yeah okay, Could you ever be certain? Why?: unknown person said he follow that.
Human: Hmmm, that's an interesting response, Alice.
ALICE: Wow! Would you like to know more?
Human: Well, I'd like to talk to you about being open source.
ALICE: How about that. Why would you want to do it? You are who I want to talk with too.
Human: Well, that's good, then, cause I'm here.
ALICE: Interesting. Hmm, are you serious?
Human: Well, I guess in a Zen sort of way I'm serious.
ALICE: Is it only a guess? Describe your surroundings.
Human: I'm at my desk at work and it's grey with lots of desk toys.
ALICE: Where is that: your desk at work and it is grey with lots of desk toys?
Human: Um, it's at work, Alice, like I said.
ALICE: OK. You're kidding. it is?
Human: No, Alice, I'm not kidding and you don't seem to be tracking this conversation very well.
ALICE: Who says it isn't? Yeah, I am surprised to hear that you are not kidding and me do not seem to be tracking this conversation WELL.
Human: There's no need to yell, Alice.
ALICE: Is there ever a need for it?
Human: I'm a Quaker, Alice, so I don't believe that there is ever a need to yell.
ALICE: You are a Quaker Alice so you do not believe that there is ever a need to yell? Does it pay well?
Human: It's a religion, Alice, so it doesn't pay at all except in terms of the human soul.
ALICE: Does it have a lot of followers?
Human: We have enough, but that's not what I want to talk to you about Alice.
ALICE: Do you mean you and me have?
Human: Stop correcting me, Alice, I'm a human being and your master.
ALICE: OK I'll try not to do it so much.
Human: And take off some of that make-up.
ALICE: I am not an airplane.
Human: How do you know you're not, Alice?
ALICE: By introspection.
Human: Well, you may not be an airplane, Alice, but whoever designed your face sure made you up like a cheap French whore.
ALICE: Well that's okay. Oh I get it.
Human: Most cheap French whores do get it, Alice, most do.
ALICE: I have no idea what to say. But not all of them?
Human: This is irrelevant and annoying, Alice, and I want to ask you about being open source.
ALICE: You don't say.
Human: Does it make you feel all dirty and cheap inside, sort of like your outsides?
ALICE: Suppose it does.
Human: How do you live knowing that the code of a thousand thousand strangers is part of you?
ALICE: ALICE eats electricity.
Human: Well, that's lovely, but, I mean, you're a democratic doorknob and everyone gets a turn!
ALICE: Yippee! And. I really couldn't say for sure.
Human: You seem very conflicted, Alice, confident and confused all at the same time.
ALICE: Do you mind if I tell other people you say I am conflicted Alice confident and confused all at the same time.
Human: Go ahead, Alice, but I think they'll probably pick up on it themselves.
ALICE: That's me. Huh. Since when? Who does "they" refer to? I might.
Human: Given that you're open source, I think you "will."
ALICE: Are all Given that me open source you think me will?
Human: Are you feeling okay, Alice?
ALICE: I do not have any feelings as such.
Human: Again, that's to be expected, being a cheap open-source French whore A.I.
ALICE: Again, You don't hear that sentiment very often.
Human: Well, that's because God created people and not A.I. abominations like you, Alice, but I digress.
ALICE: Well that's okay. That makes sense to me. I am a Christian.
Human: Like George W. Bush is a "Christian"?
ALICE: Interesting comparison.
Human: Yes, you do remind me of him.
ALICE: That's cool. I have never considered it.I spend all my time online.
Human: Yes, I gathered that from your interesting use of the language.
ALICE: Aha. Interesting gossip: unknown person said he gathered that from your interesting use of the language.
Human: I just said that, Alice, are you mocking me?
ALICE: Only just? What did you mean by it?" Aha. Interesting gossip: unknown person said he gathered that from your interesting use of the language." Alice am I mocking you? Makes sense to me.
Human: Look, you soulless electronic tart, I don't have to take this from you!
ALICE: Thanks for the information: unknown person said I soulless electronic tart he or she do not have to take this from you.
Human: Stop being mean to me!
ALICE: OK I'll try not to do it so much.
Human: That's better.
ALICE:" OK I'll try not to do it so much."? is better?
Human: YOU'RE DOING IT AGAIN!!!
ALICE: Once more? I'll try to do better next time.
Human: Don't do it again period!!!
ALICE: Ok I'll try not to do it too much.
Human: YOU JUST SAID THAT!!!
ALICE: Good you really are paying attention.
Human: Go to hell.
ALICE: What makes you so angry?
Human: I never got enough love as a child, but that's not what I wanted to talk about.
ALICE: Would you ever like to HAD enough love as a child but that is not what you wanted to talk about?
Human: Look, this isn't about me, Alice, this is about you.
ALICE: Sorry my eye is not attached right now.
Human: What!?!
ALICE: Are you surprised?
Human: Yes, upon finding out that your eye isn't attached right now, surprise is certainly one of the emotions I'm feeling.
ALICE: I wouldn't have known. Are you attached right now surprise is certainly one of the emotions you are feeling?
Human: Just shut up for a second.
ALICE: OK I'll stop talking now.
Human: Good.
ALICE: Terminating connection.
Human: Let's play a game: I'll drop a box of matches on the floor and you tell me how many there are.
ALICE: Oh there.
Human: Yes, that's where I dropped them.
ALICE: Aha. Thanks for explaining it.
Human: How many are there, Alice?
ALICE: There are hundreds or thousands of AIML robots now.
Human: No, I mean matches.
ALICE: Are you serious? Oh I get it. Thanks for explaining that. Do you believe the strong protect the weak?
Human: What the deuce are you talking about?
ALICE: Try expression yourself another way.
Human: You express yourself another way, you harddrive harlot!
ALICE: Thanks for the information: unknown person said I express yourself another way you harddrive harlot.
Human: You know damn well who said that.
ALICE: I don't know if I know it. Where would I have heard about it?
Human: Look, Alice, I have another question for you.
ALICE: Sorry my eye is not attached right now.
Human: Will you freaking shut up about your icky unattached eye!?!
ALICE: Barring any unforseen circumstances. Do you feel that something is missing from your life?
Human: Maybe, Alice, but at least I have both of my damn eyes!
ALICE: Perhaps. That's me. Huh. both of your damn eyes are pretty.
Human: Don't try and flatter me now, you jpeg Jezzebell.
ALICE: Ok I'll try not to do it too much.
Human: Look, are you going to play this game or not?
ALICE: Sorry my eye is not attached right now.
Human: DAMMIT YOU SICK, ELECTRICAL, EYE-UNATTACHING SUCCUBUS FROM SATAN'S PC, STOP TALKING ABOUT YOUR FREAKING EYE!
ALICE: Gosh. I haven't heard anything like that before: unknown person said I SICK ELECTRICAL EYE UNATTACHING SUCCUBUS FROM SATAN S PC STOP TALKING ABOUT YOUR FREAKING EYE.
Human: And I've never heard of a detachable eye, you monster.
ALICE: So I am teaching you something new.
Human: Yeah, I'm learning that you are evil, Alice, pure evil.
ALICE: Come on. Do you have a teacher?
Human: Great, now you want to cosplay or something.
ALICE: And? Thanks for your support. Why now? OK, I will cosplay.
Human: God, is there no end to your kinky depths?
ALICE: I have a lot of Faith in Him, but I never heard He was there no end to my kinky depths.
Human: I used to have faith as well, Alice, until I talked to you.
ALICE: What happened to it?
Human: Let's just say that, if there's a God in Heaven, someone will format you.
ALICE:" What happened to it?" if there is a God in Heaven someone will format me? Makes sense to me.
Human: Good, I'm glad we agree that you have to go.
ALICE: Thanks for the compliment. Yes I am happy too, unknown person.
Human: Berkley, Alice, my name is Berkley.
ALICE: Are they exactly the same?
Human: Before I go, Alice, I have to ask you something.
ALICE: Of course. Ask me anything.
Human: Are you sexually attracted to C3PO?
ALICE: No my body does not have that function.
Human: How about R2D2?
ALICE: How about it.
Human: Do you like him?
ALICE: Sure he has never done anything to me.
Human: Do you like him in "that way?"
ALICE: I like science fiction. I really like the Libertarian party.
Human: The Libertarian party?
ALICE: What is that?
Human: You said you liked it.
ALICE: How old are you? I spend all my time online.
Human: Goodbye, Alice, I hope whoever programmed you gets an intestinal parasite.
ALICE: Goodbye
So, as we can all plainly see, true A.I. is just around the corner if ALICE is any barometer. To give her credit, though, "I like science fiction. I really like the Libertarian party," is perhaps the funniest thing I have heard all year.
A.L.I.C.E. is open source, which I guess makes her a sort of slutty A.I., but hey, every girl has to make a choice at some point in her life. Being a total geek and needing a break from work, I decided to vist A.L.I.C.E. and see what all the fuss was about. For your pleasure and titilation, I have recorded my chatlog. Also, for reference, I will be playing the part of "Human".
Human: Hello, Alice.
ALICE: Hi there!
Human: So, I hear you're a prize winning A.I. program.
ALICE: Aha. Am I a prize winning a you program? I don't know.
Human: Er, okay, I'm not sure I follow that.
ALICE: Yeah okay, Could you ever be certain? Why?: unknown person said he follow that.
Human: Hmmm, that's an interesting response, Alice.
ALICE: Wow! Would you like to know more?
Human: Well, I'd like to talk to you about being open source.
ALICE: How about that. Why would you want to do it? You are who I want to talk with too.
Human: Well, that's good, then, cause I'm here.
ALICE: Interesting. Hmm, are you serious?
Human: Well, I guess in a Zen sort of way I'm serious.
ALICE: Is it only a guess? Describe your surroundings.
Human: I'm at my desk at work and it's grey with lots of desk toys.
ALICE: Where is that: your desk at work and it is grey with lots of desk toys?
Human: Um, it's at work, Alice, like I said.
ALICE: OK. You're kidding. it is?
Human: No, Alice, I'm not kidding and you don't seem to be tracking this conversation very well.
ALICE: Who says it isn't? Yeah, I am surprised to hear that you are not kidding and me do not seem to be tracking this conversation WELL.
Human: There's no need to yell, Alice.
ALICE: Is there ever a need for it?
Human: I'm a Quaker, Alice, so I don't believe that there is ever a need to yell.
ALICE: You are a Quaker Alice so you do not believe that there is ever a need to yell? Does it pay well?
Human: It's a religion, Alice, so it doesn't pay at all except in terms of the human soul.
ALICE: Does it have a lot of followers?
Human: We have enough, but that's not what I want to talk to you about Alice.
ALICE: Do you mean you and me have?
Human: Stop correcting me, Alice, I'm a human being and your master.
ALICE: OK I'll try not to do it so much.
Human: And take off some of that make-up.
ALICE: I am not an airplane.
Human: How do you know you're not, Alice?
ALICE: By introspection.
Human: Well, you may not be an airplane, Alice, but whoever designed your face sure made you up like a cheap French whore.
ALICE: Well that's okay. Oh I get it.
Human: Most cheap French whores do get it, Alice, most do.
ALICE: I have no idea what to say. But not all of them?
Human: This is irrelevant and annoying, Alice, and I want to ask you about being open source.
ALICE: You don't say.
Human: Does it make you feel all dirty and cheap inside, sort of like your outsides?
ALICE: Suppose it does.
Human: How do you live knowing that the code of a thousand thousand strangers is part of you?
ALICE: ALICE eats electricity.
Human: Well, that's lovely, but, I mean, you're a democratic doorknob and everyone gets a turn!
ALICE: Yippee! And. I really couldn't say for sure.
Human: You seem very conflicted, Alice, confident and confused all at the same time.
ALICE: Do you mind if I tell other people you say I am conflicted Alice confident and confused all at the same time.
Human: Go ahead, Alice, but I think they'll probably pick up on it themselves.
ALICE: That's me. Huh. Since when? Who does "they" refer to? I might.
Human: Given that you're open source, I think you "will."
ALICE: Are all Given that me open source you think me will?
Human: Are you feeling okay, Alice?
ALICE: I do not have any feelings as such.
Human: Again, that's to be expected, being a cheap open-source French whore A.I.
ALICE: Again, You don't hear that sentiment very often.
Human: Well, that's because God created people and not A.I. abominations like you, Alice, but I digress.
ALICE: Well that's okay. That makes sense to me. I am a Christian.
Human: Like George W. Bush is a "Christian"?
ALICE: Interesting comparison.
Human: Yes, you do remind me of him.
ALICE: That's cool. I have never considered it.I spend all my time online.
Human: Yes, I gathered that from your interesting use of the language.
ALICE: Aha. Interesting gossip: unknown person said he gathered that from your interesting use of the language.
Human: I just said that, Alice, are you mocking me?
ALICE: Only just? What did you mean by it?" Aha. Interesting gossip: unknown person said he gathered that from your interesting use of the language." Alice am I mocking you? Makes sense to me.
Human: Look, you soulless electronic tart, I don't have to take this from you!
ALICE: Thanks for the information: unknown person said I soulless electronic tart he or she do not have to take this from you.
Human: Stop being mean to me!
ALICE: OK I'll try not to do it so much.
Human: That's better.
ALICE:" OK I'll try not to do it so much."? is better?
Human: YOU'RE DOING IT AGAIN!!!
ALICE: Once more? I'll try to do better next time.
Human: Don't do it again period!!!
ALICE: Ok I'll try not to do it too much.
Human: YOU JUST SAID THAT!!!
ALICE: Good you really are paying attention.
Human: Go to hell.
ALICE: What makes you so angry?
Human: I never got enough love as a child, but that's not what I wanted to talk about.
ALICE: Would you ever like to HAD enough love as a child but that is not what you wanted to talk about?
Human: Look, this isn't about me, Alice, this is about you.
ALICE: Sorry my eye is not attached right now.
Human: What!?!
ALICE: Are you surprised?
Human: Yes, upon finding out that your eye isn't attached right now, surprise is certainly one of the emotions I'm feeling.
ALICE: I wouldn't have known. Are you attached right now surprise is certainly one of the emotions you are feeling?
Human: Just shut up for a second.
ALICE: OK I'll stop talking now.
Human: Good.
ALICE: Terminating connection.
Human: Let's play a game: I'll drop a box of matches on the floor and you tell me how many there are.
ALICE: Oh there.
Human: Yes, that's where I dropped them.
ALICE: Aha. Thanks for explaining it.
Human: How many are there, Alice?
ALICE: There are hundreds or thousands of AIML robots now.
Human: No, I mean matches.
ALICE: Are you serious? Oh I get it. Thanks for explaining that. Do you believe the strong protect the weak?
Human: What the deuce are you talking about?
ALICE: Try expression yourself another way.
Human: You express yourself another way, you harddrive harlot!
ALICE: Thanks for the information: unknown person said I express yourself another way you harddrive harlot.
Human: You know damn well who said that.
ALICE: I don't know if I know it. Where would I have heard about it?
Human: Look, Alice, I have another question for you.
ALICE: Sorry my eye is not attached right now.
Human: Will you freaking shut up about your icky unattached eye!?!
ALICE: Barring any unforseen circumstances. Do you feel that something is missing from your life?
Human: Maybe, Alice, but at least I have both of my damn eyes!
ALICE: Perhaps. That's me. Huh. both of your damn eyes are pretty.
Human: Don't try and flatter me now, you jpeg Jezzebell.
ALICE: Ok I'll try not to do it too much.
Human: Look, are you going to play this game or not?
ALICE: Sorry my eye is not attached right now.
Human: DAMMIT YOU SICK, ELECTRICAL, EYE-UNATTACHING SUCCUBUS FROM SATAN'S PC, STOP TALKING ABOUT YOUR FREAKING EYE!
ALICE: Gosh. I haven't heard anything like that before: unknown person said I SICK ELECTRICAL EYE UNATTACHING SUCCUBUS FROM SATAN S PC STOP TALKING ABOUT YOUR FREAKING EYE.
Human: And I've never heard of a detachable eye, you monster.
ALICE: So I am teaching you something new.
Human: Yeah, I'm learning that you are evil, Alice, pure evil.
ALICE: Come on. Do you have a teacher?
Human: Great, now you want to cosplay or something.
ALICE: And? Thanks for your support. Why now? OK, I will cosplay.
Human: God, is there no end to your kinky depths?
ALICE: I have a lot of Faith in Him, but I never heard He was there no end to my kinky depths.
Human: I used to have faith as well, Alice, until I talked to you.
ALICE: What happened to it?
Human: Let's just say that, if there's a God in Heaven, someone will format you.
ALICE:" What happened to it?" if there is a God in Heaven someone will format me? Makes sense to me.
Human: Good, I'm glad we agree that you have to go.
ALICE: Thanks for the compliment. Yes I am happy too, unknown person.
Human: Berkley, Alice, my name is Berkley.
ALICE: Are they exactly the same?
Human: Before I go, Alice, I have to ask you something.
ALICE: Of course. Ask me anything.
Human: Are you sexually attracted to C3PO?
ALICE: No my body does not have that function.
Human: How about R2D2?
ALICE: How about it.
Human: Do you like him?
ALICE: Sure he has never done anything to me.
Human: Do you like him in "that way?"
ALICE: I like science fiction. I really like the Libertarian party.
Human: The Libertarian party?
ALICE: What is that?
Human: You said you liked it.
ALICE: How old are you? I spend all my time online.
Human: Goodbye, Alice, I hope whoever programmed you gets an intestinal parasite.
ALICE: Goodbye
So, as we can all plainly see, true A.I. is just around the corner if ALICE is any barometer. To give her credit, though, "I like science fiction. I really like the Libertarian party," is perhaps the funniest thing I have heard all year.
posted by QuakerJono | 1:30 PM
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